Amnon was the first son of David, king of Israel and he was born into a leadership position because as the firstborn of his father, he was the head of his siblings and his father’s household. Also, he should have become king and leader of Israel after his father’s death. He began as a leader amongst his siblings and would have moved to become the leader of the nation Israel, but due to bad leadership at the home front, he never reigned as king, an assignment he was born for.
Amnon’s trouble began when he fell in love with his half-sister Tamar, Absalom’s sister. Amnon clearly could not control what he felt for his beautiful virgin sister and became sick. He had a friend, Jonadab whom the Bible describes as a subtil man. Jonadab was curious and wanted to know why Amnon’s health deteriorated daily, and Amnon proceeded to tell Jonadab that he was in love with Tamar, Absalom’s sister. Being a crafty man, Jonadab advised Amnon to pretend to be sick and request that his sister Tamar be sent to his house to cook him a meal. Amnon followed the advice of Jonadab, and when his father, David, sent Tamar to his home to prepare him a meal, he seized the opportunity of being alone with her and raped her.
Unfortunately, he did not think much of the consequences of his actions. Perhaps as the king’s first son and the future king of Israel, he thought he could get away with the deed but, not so, he paid dearly for it with his life because Absalom killed him for the act of wickedness against his sister, Tamar. And so Amnon died a king and a leader who was born to reign but, never did.
There are several leadership qualities that Amnon lacked which reveal why he failed in his first duty as a leader in his father’s house and why he would have been a bad king had he sat on the throne after David, his father.
In John Maxwell’s book, “The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader”, he lists certain qualities that every leader should have. The Bible’s record of the events reveals that Amnon lacked these qualities, but I will highlight only a few of them here.
One leadership quality he lacked was character. Like Samson, he was a leader who could not lead himself, and as a result, he died without an opportunity to ascend the throne and lead the nation of Israel.
The second leadership quality he lacked was commitment. He claimed to love Tamar, but when it was time to commit to her, he failed to follow through.
Three, he was not a focused person. His lust for Tamar was a massive distraction from the throne he should have been pursuing, but he failed to see it because he had no focus, to begin with. His lack of focus eventually caused him to lose the throne.
The fourth leadership quality he lacked was that of listening. He was not a man who listened to those he led. Tamar tried to warn him of the mistake he was making in sending her away after defiling her, but he paid no attention to what she had to say and paid dearly for it.
The fifth leadership quality he lacked was self-discipline; his failure to control his lust for his sister and his act of violently raping her prove this.
The sixth leadership quality he lacked was servanthood. His leadership position as the firstborn of his father should have been used to serve his siblings and other members of his father’s household, but it was used to serve his selfish purpose and desires to the detriment of those he led. This is anything but leadership. Little wonder he never made it to the throne as the leader of God’s people, Israel.
