Meg Nocero is an attorney, writer, speaker, and empowerment coach. Following in the footsteps of her grandfather, Congressman Alfred Santangelo, who was an American lawyer and politician, Meg served the United States as a Federal Attorney with the Department of Homeland Security for almost twenty years. In this role, she mentored hundreds of student interns in the field of immigration law. In 2017, she resigned and started a non-profit called S.H.I.N.E Networking Inc to promote story sharing, community building, diversity, ideas, hope, and networking. Her non-profit also provides educational scholarships to support young innovative leaders who are making a difference. Meg is a wife and mother and loves her children and Shetland sheepdogs. In this interview, she shares her journey of leaving her job after almost two decades and following her dreams. As you read her story, be inspired to discover where you want to shine. Don’t miss the whole point of being here. Live the life you truly want. Meg shows you how.
Meg tell us about serving the United States as a federal attorney representing the government in the immigration court for nearly twenty years. What was it that attracted you to this job in the first instance? Was it a childhood dream?
Oh, no, no. Who has a childhood dream to do that? Not me. But what I did get exposed to as a kid, my grandfather was in the US Congress. He was a congressman in the 60s for the state of New York. That was very impressionable on me because I would go to his house in New York and I would see pictures of my grandfather with John F. Kennedy and Irving Howe and of course, Sophia Loren, which was my favourite because we’re Italians. And just seeing these really incredible pictures of someone who I was related to, and I loved, with all these notables. And my grandfather was very passionate about promoting the rights of Italians basically giving them a voice in a political scenario. Back in those days, it was more of like the untouchables, and they were seen as the bad immigrants. That being said, my mother was a huge advocate of education. My God, both my parents were huge promoters of education. They said you could do anything in life as long as you get yourself an education. Meaning that education, not that it was like one of these burdensome things but that it opens your mind to think differently and see things differently and exposes you to a different world. But it wasn’t my dream to be a federal attorney although when I did go to law school that was something that I did in fact visualise.
So how did you go from visualising to it actually happening?
Okay, so I’m a huge power of intention kind of person. I graduated from college with joint languages degree, because I wanted to break the barrier between me and other people. I wanted to be able to speak to as many people as I can, so I learnt Spanish and Italian, and I learnt French. When I graduated, I was like, okay, what do I do next? I was like, I was going to go to law school, and it was during the recession, and everybody was applying to law school. I did, but I didn’t get in, and I was like I’m going home. So, I went back to Orlando and took classes in International Studies, International Relations, and they really intrigued me, and I loved the teachers that I had. When I finished the classes, I was like, oh my God, I’m getting my master’s in international studies. So, I applied to schools and got into the University of Miami and studied International Security. And what brought me to the federal government was, I was trying to figure out a way to compliment my languages with my International Security background. Meanwhile I didn’t go forward because I was afraid that they wouldn’t let me take my dog with me and my dog was coming with me no matter where I went so, I went to law school. And it’s so funny because that was the reason why I decided to go into law, because of my dog. And it’s so funny because I always ask people, why do you want to go into law and they tell me these really grand notions and these beautiful ideals, and I say, because I wanted to not leave my dog. So, I went to law school, and in my last year, one of my friends who knew of my background actually contacted me because they had seen a flyer for immigration and naturalisation service; they were looking for interns. I said, oh my God, this is perfect. So, I applied, and I got the job. I knew someone and he was very helpful in getting me the internship, which then turned into a job that I really enjoyed.
So, what are some of the things that you accomplished while on this job and what lessons did you learn which are now useful to you in your current work?
Well, let me tell you, at this job, I had the opportunity to set up an intern programme and one of the most incredible opportunities I’ve ever had in my life. Because what my office actually allowed me to do is go out to the different universities and meet with students and see which ones would be a really good fit for our office. And then what I would get to do is take them under my wing and teach them how to be attorneys. Now, that being said, not only did I take them under a professional contact but also through their personal dreams and ambitions. Because like I said before, I am very much of an intentional person, I am a manifestor. I believe in the power of dreams. And when I met these individuals, I would have very unorthodox interviews because I wanted to get to know them past their strengths and weaknesses; I wanted to know what they thought after and what they intended to get out of the experience. And I was very blessed that one of my interns who started working for the government became my partner and we basically went out and we ran this programme for eighteen, nineteen years, and it was probably one of the best intern programmes in Miami. So, that is one of the things that I am immensely proud of. A lot of students gained confidence by virtue of the fact that I had them like push their limits as far as jumping, taking a leap, doing the cases, seeing that they’re not too scared of the unknown. But as well, I would tell them, and I think this goes across the board in any profession, that your reputation is so important, and integrity and character are so important in this world. And we seem to lose sight of that in the general scope, so I really made it a point to encourage them to maintain their authenticity at the same time integrity and character. And I’ve made many good friends as a result of working with these wonderful students. And now, with what I am doing now, it’s basically what I was doing then in that context except bringing it to a greater scope. Because one of the things that are a part of my resume or my curriculum vitae is, I am empowerment coaching and I invite people to truly embrace what it is that they intend for their life. And then match it with the inspired action steps that will get them to the next phase. And I am a big advocate of taking the next generation and using the wisdom that I’ve gained because it is hard earned. We all know sometimes we learn more from the failures than we do the successes. It’s using that wisdom to create a network of collaboration rather than competition. And it’s been initially kind of bouncy, stumbling across my own self in this new field, but it’s rewarding. It’s something that I constantly keep in the front of me that I am here to inspire others to come alive to the beauty of their dreams whatever they may be.
Why did you decide to leave and at the time that you did? And what did you find most challenging about walking away from this wonderful job and the security and prestige that came with it?
Yes. Wow. Well you know sometimes, when you ask for something, and God answers, and then you’re like too scared to move, and God just starts slamming doors. And I’m like, okay, I am not supposed to stay here anymore. You know the interesting thing is this, I can tell you one of the things that has been really impactful in my life is the loss of my mother in 2011. And it’s interesting because I always had a certain way that I saw my life unfolding. You know, get married have kids have a great job, get promoted, reach the pinnacle of my career and then you know, a vision of me walking off into the sunset, I don’t know. That is, we all have these ideas, and I didn’t imagine my mother not being there. And so, when she passed away, it just shook me because she was really my mentor. And interestingly enough, I never experienced grief before and I never thought I would just crumble under its impressive weight, but that’s exactly what happened. And unfortunately, or fortunately, I really believe – you know they always say those things in life that wake you up. I had to take a look at my life and say, what is it that I want? And I really enjoyed what I did for a significant time period. I had gotten really great relationships; the judges had been really amazing mentors to me, I’d made many good friends. But at a certain point in time you’re looking for professional growth. And I think that a lot of people stay for the thirty years and they’re very happy, they retire, and they have their pension, but I, after I lost my mother, I started writing. I started expressing myself in a blog and I was like, wow. And I started getting more people involved. I just really wanted to kind of shakeup whoever I could that stop walking numbly through your life. And I kind of numbed out when my mum died. But she said to me before she passed away, stress will kill you, and you should not go to your grave with regrets. So, that being said, I looked at my life with new eyes. You know you look at your life, and you’re like, wow, this is not what I want. But let’s see this, it’s great security, I have children, I want to make sure that I can give them a life where they can seek their dream. The doors started opening, and then the doors started closing because when I published my book, it was very exciting. It was a new world for me. It actually had me facing a lot of my fears that I had from my childhood. And then I came to a point where I had the opportunity to apply for a promotion in my office. And my whole office had changed, you know, the chain of command and I basically said to God, you know I have conversations with God all the time. And I said, God I am going to put in for this; this job should be mine; it really should be. Because I had been supervising in a capacity of almost three hundred law students for almost like I said eighteen years plus. And I knew the job, I knew how to supervise people, I really intended to bring the best out of people and address their needs. And I believe a manager that is their job – to help those who are working for them do the best job that they could possibly do while addressing their concerns, etcetera. So, I applied for the job, and it was funny because this time I was going to show up as authentically me, which is very magical in many respects. I am not the grave government, right? I am not. I’ll show up with colours. So, I went to the interview and I said I am going to show up as authentically as I could. I even quoted Maya Angelou to myself, people will remember how you made them feel. And that really truly is what I took in and what I took out, because when I left the interview, I was like, oh my God, I do not want to work with these people. Like, I really do not feel inspired. But I am like, okay, I’m putting it in God’s hands. And it is interesting, I received the week before the election, this current election, the administration 2016, I received a letter from Lin Miranda of Hamilton. And he commended me on my book. And I was like, oh my God, I’ve really been inspired by this person, he is amazing, he’s creative. And then the week later I found out that I didn’t get the promotion and that for me was an answer. So, I was like, oh my God, I need to leave. And I went to Washington for about six months, and I was like, this is not for me anymore. But I was terrified because I had almost twenty years under my belt working with the federal government. I had prestige, the judges knew me, I did a good job, I knew my job. But I was like, there’s something more out there. And the doors, I am telling you, they kept closing in my face. Even the intern programme that I set up, this new person who was the chief in my office was telling me that these two that were appointed were equal to me as far as who we were in the committee. And I had basically designed the committee and run the committee and I even hired these two girls – wonderful people, very intelligent women. And I was like, no, I am not here to stagnate. I need to figure out a way to blossom, continue to blossom. Because if you don’t grow, you die, right? So that is pretty much it in a nutshell.
You now work as an attorney, writer, speaker, and empowerment coach. And you founded and run a non-profit called S.H.I.N.E Networking Inc. So, will you please tell us about this new life and new job that you have post-resignation? And what is the vision of S.H.I.N.E Networking Inc?
First of all, I have to tell you what birth S.H.I.N.E Networking. And this is quite a wakeup call that many people say how did you manifest that? But in 2014, before I even published my book, I was at the Live the Life You Want event with Oprah Winfrey and Guests in Miami. And I found myself on stage with her, with Oprah, because she called me up. And I could get into the whole story, but it would probably take me too long. Anyway, long story short, I’m on stage with Oprah, this visionary that I’ve always wanted to meet; she’s an incredible, powerful, amazing woman who is inspirational to many. And I’m standing on stage with her, my good friend is on the other side of her, and I’m looking out at 15,000 people in the audience. I’m having the best time of my life, like, no way this is happening. And of course, it’s happening. So, she looks to me and she says, Meg, pay attention! Because you can hear me from the interview, I get excited. And I was very excited by the way. And she looked me in the eye, and she’s like, Meg, look at me! Look at me! And you know, of course, Oprah Winfrey is telling me to listen to her, and I’m looking at her, and she says, it’s time to live the life that you want. And I’m like, oh my God! And I looked up, and I felt like it was my mother, and God, and whatever guardian angels, talking to me. It’s like, Meg, this is big, you need to wake up and live the life you want. No more playing here. Remember, stress will kill you and no regrets. And I was just like, okay. So, I published my book, and I started S.H.I.N.E. Now, S.H.I.N.E came about because I wanted to continue this incredible, energetic, positive vibration in my community on a continued basis. Because you know, she can come here and do her thing, and everyone gets excited and motivated, but to inspire something into life, bring something into life, that’s really to give people life. That’s kind of thing I was going for and S.H.I.N.E actually stands for Spirit Hope Insight and Networking Event. So, what we intended to do, as a team, I have a team, and I could not function without my amazing team. We got together and with all our different talents, because we’ve all got amazing different talents, we structured this event where we have inspirational speakers then interactive with networking and then leaving people with tools to start looking at their own lives and saying, where do I want to shine? What do I want to create? So that is S.H.I.N.E. Then we turned it into a non-profit so we could provide educational scholarships to young innovative leaders in the community. So that we could help them know that what they’re doing is important, so they can continue to shine. So, empowering the next generation ahead. Remember, education was inbred in me. That was the way in which you actually turned your life into something really beautiful, by acquiring education. So, there’s the legacy of my parents, me doing it for a broader audience as well. So, that is where we are with S.H.I.N.E. And this year we’re shining love. So, I feel that with all of the animosity, and the adversity, we need to get back to the root, which is love. God is love. And we start with love and the foundation of love, and we go to what we love, and who we love, and taking care of self-love, and care, and kind of pulling back into what it is that we want to see created in each of our lives.
Meg, is your life post-resignation everything that you hoped it would be? So, can you say that this is your life’s purpose and if so, why?
Okay, I keep saying change is not for the weak of heart, right? You know, when you take a leap of faith, sometimes you wish you could hold on to the side of the mountain, right? You’re like, what the hell did I just do, right? It’s like, what did I just do? And mind you, you’re falling, and you’re looking back, and you’re thinking, hmm. Well, I guess at that point you just can’t look back anymore. And you just have a figure out a way of how you’re going to be able to, like my friends and I say, float on the breath of God. A feather floating on the breath of God. So, bottom line is, I can tell you that it’s been quite a challenge because of me making decisions to leave the federal government and what I believe was a prestigious job. You know it took a hit to my ego how it happened even though it was my choice to leave. I didn’t have to, but I had to lick my wounds so to speak. And also pull myself up by the bootstraps and get confident that this choice was in fact in line with my journey to bliss. So, I can tell you that it’s been a lot of highs and lows. I am not an introverted person but I’ve been forced to be alone a lot which is good because I was able to do a lot of introspection, which if you give me a chance of going out and playing with my friends or staying home and writing, I enjoy writing, but I’d rather go and play. I’m here to play. So, it was a forced introspective time, and I can tell you that I am a hundred percent certain that I am on the correct path. And when I ask for signs, I get them. There’s a beautiful poem I continue to use as my north star and it’s by Mary Oliver, bless her soul, she passed away just recently. It’s living a conscious life, pay attention, be astonished and tell all about it. And when we pay attention to the moments in time that elevate you and give you wisdom, and all of the above and look for your angels that pop in and pop out, then you kind of guide yourself back on course. And then the whole is astonished, exactly what I do all the time. I just get excited. Get excited about opportunities that show up, don’t question it. Say, Amen and move on. Take it and if you don’t think you know what you’re doing, take it and figure it out later. I’m a big advocate for believing more in yourself and then when you need the help, find those that believe in you to encourage you on, which certainly my soul tribe I have, and I am very lucky. But I can tell you post-resignation has been – I didn’t know what to expect. I did have to re-evaluate my own interpretation of who I am. Who is Meg? Who am I? I can tell you that this is definitely on the path of my purpose. I still don’t know where I’m going, which I can be honest about, but I know that I am not alone. So that is amazing, and it’s really strengthened my own personal relationship with my husband and my family, and I get to be with my family. Before I would get home at 7.30 at night and I had no time for my kids, and I had a ten-year-old and a 16-year old. I would have missed out on so much because of the lack of flexibility, now I have freedom. And plus, in April this past year, I had the opportunity to go on a spiritual pilgrimage to Spain, and gosh did I find myself there. And I would never have been able to do that had I stayed. So, there’s always give and take, but I did know it was time. It was time. The doors in my face, it hurt. Everyone says to me, oh my God, you’re so courageous. No. It was just more uncomfortable staying than it was to go.
Let’s talk about your book, The Magical Guide to Bliss: Daily Keys to Unlock Your Dreams, Spirit and Inner Bliss. So, what is this book about?
So basically, I started telling the advice my mother would give me because one of my good friends said, you can’t cut off the tie so badly, it’s too shocking. So, if you get quiet and start paying attention maybe you’ll get messages. And in truth, I started channelling what it was I believed my mother would want me to know. And they started as insights, and I started sharing them, and I put them in a book format where February is all about love, March is all about wisdom and so on. My favourite, April. It is about transforming dreams into reality. And basically, it’s a magical guide to living the best life you want. So I put it into 366 insights to turn you on this journey where you get introspective yourself, take the keys, try to see how you can focus on your life differently that will give you the shift to come alive to your dreams. I have to tell you; I followed my own book. I used that book basically to articulate my second book, The Beautiful Butterfly. I followed my own mother’s advice basically and walked into this empowered life that I live right now, which you know has a lot of ups and downs, which is life. But I am on this journey to bliss, and I know it. And when something resonates with me, I feel it in my gut, and when it doesn’t, I pay attention to my intuition, and say, yes, when I’m supposed to say yes and, no, when I’m supposed to say no. Because it doesn’t stick with me. And it’s on sale right now at Amazon.
So how did writing this book transform your life and the lives of the readers? So, in other words, has it had the kind of impact that you hoped it would have?
What I had hoped for, with publishing my book, was that somebody who needed it, some kind of message would come to them from what I wrote. And they could take it, and it would help them. It would help them and keep the hope alive because I really believe the world is full of so much potential and so many opportunities. There’re so many good people, and when you’ve been burned so many times, you start to think otherwise. But I want a shift, and I really hope that my book can be a part of that progress and that process. I can tell you this, one of the most incredible things that I love more than anything is when someone contacts me and tells me, thank you. Just, thank you. Because it was really truly a vulnerable experience for me to put my work out there in public. Because I am a very critical person of myself more than anybody else in the world. And I am very much terrified because there’s so much nasty coming from so many people and I’m very thin-skinned, I wear my heart on my sleeve. It’s very hard to take that kind of criticism, especially when this was a labour of love. The coolest thing, my father and I, we didn’t have as close of a relationship before my mother passed away. But he called me and told me how incredible my book was, and he wrote the foreword of my book too. He was able to be a part of that. But how impactful, and he’s a cardiologist. So, it’s like a scientist mind. He may not be creative, but he was just all about consciousness and mindfulness, awareness, and wake up people, you’re missing it, you’re missing the whole point of why we’re here. You’re missing the message. You can be a part of something wonderful as well. You can be a part of that process. You can be a part of that message. You can be a part for yourself, your family, for everything. And I know there’s hard times, and people go through it, I get it. I have been through it, I’m beaten, bruised, and everything. But, you know, I still get up. I don’t give up. Passion and perseverance go far. So yeah, I can tell you, it’s so unimaginable how much I am impacted by the responses I have gotten from people reading my book and how I can be a part of their creative recovery perhaps. That makes me excited. And when I published my second book, Beautiful Butterfly, I was sharing my story rather than the insights. It was a very scary thing, because you’re very vulnerable with your story. But if it can help somebody feel possibility in their life, then it’s worth it.
How can people contact you?
I have a webpage, www.megnocero.com. They can contact me through the email there. Also, I am on Facebook, and on LinkedIn, Instagram, and Twitter. Message me, I respond to everyone who does in fact message me.
